Today is my son's 8th birthday. This makes today also my 8th birthday since I got a new identity that day: Mama.
Over the past few days, I've been thinking about those events surrounding his birth and the emotions surrounding them - fear, anticipation, uncertainty, joy. This morning, a new thought occurred to me.
During Nathan's birth, I was injured pretty badly. I will spare you the details (and myself the embarrassment), but let's put it this way: while new Moms are usually out of bed (either by choice or by insistence of the nurse) not long after the birth, I was still in the bed, hooked up to most everything, two days later. What happened wasn't anyone's fault, and thankfully Nathan wasn't hurt in any way. It was just one of those things.
The recovery wasn't fun, and while I have long-since healed, I still deal with some consequences from time to time. But you know what? He was worth it. Absolutely worth it. If I had it to do all over again, I'd - well, I'd have a C-section. :-) If that wasn't possible, though, I'd go through it all again without question.
Every now and then, most often when I'm thinking about my children, it's as though God clears His throat to say, "I've been trying to tell you this!" It happened again this morning. I understood more clearly than I have in a long time that Jesus, if given the choice, would do it all over again for me, without question. Yes, the pain He endured on Good Friday was indescribable (not even in the same universe as labor pain), but He has no regrets. He thinks I was worth it. Absolutely worth it. Ungrateful, wretched sinner me.
He feels that way about you, too.
"But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." ~Romans 5:8 (NASB)
I love you, too, Nathan. Thank You, Jesus, for the unspeakable gifts of salvation and motherhood.